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Cyclist Molly Weaver on the crash that led to depression and the unhealthy drive for perfection

[img]https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/480/cpsprodpb/08C1/production/_101914220_bbcphoto3.jpg" srcset="https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/240/cpsprodpb/08C1/production/_101914220_bbcphoto3.jpg 240w, https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/320/cpsprodpb/08C1/production/_101914220_bbcphoto3.jpg 320w, https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/480/cpsprodpb/08C1/production/_101914220_bbcphoto3.jpg 480w, https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/624/cpsprodpb/08C1/production/_101914220_bbcphoto3.jpg 624w, https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/800/cpsprodpb/08C1/production/_101914220_bbcphoto3.jpg 800w" sizes="(min-width: 900px) 50vw, (min-width: 600px) 70vw, 100vw" alt="Molly Weaver" class="">
Weaver raced the Giro Rosa in Italy less than six months after the crashMolly Weaver broke her neck, five vertebrae, her sternum, a shoulder and four ribs, punctured a lung and tore a kidney when she was hit by a car.The professional cyclist could have been killed, or at the very least paralysed. But within seven weeks, she was back on her bike, and told her mum she could "never be unhappy again".Instagram[/i] page and you're presented with images of idyllic backdrops to training rides, selfies with animals and smiles. Lots of smiles.How could this account belong to someone who has depression[/img]
"As soon as I'd get home, I was on my own, and it is really tiring to keep that act up all the time. It would hit me twice as hard."I didn't want to be labelled as someone who had suffered with mental health problems, I didn't want to be the rider who stepped away due to depression, but actually, how many people are there out there hiding this?"It makes you wonder why people are lying, why they are presenting this picture. Obviously no-one wants to be depressive and down the whole time, but I also think there is a certain element of 'why can't we be more honest about how things really are?'"
[img]http://www.bbc.co.uk/data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP//yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7[/img]

"I'd be very confident, outgoing and talkative, smiley and chatty - that is who I am"
'You can rise again' - the future
I'm just going to see where life takes me and explore other things that I want to do. I just want to fall back in love with riding a bike.Weaver had a promising cycling career ahead of her but, for now, that is on the backburner. Health and happiness are the priorities.While ideas are in the pipeline, she's unsure what the future holds, but knows life on two wheels will never not be an option."I don't have any plan to return at the moment, but I also don't have any plan not to," she says. "I don't want to close the door on it and it be all over."Hopefully one day it will circle back around but if things go a different direction and I find something else, I'm not going to put pressure on myself to go back to cycling."Just below her left elbow, Weaver has a tattoo that reads 'Still I Rise'. A fan of the ink, it was the first tattoo she got post-accident and serves as a permanent reminder of what she has - and continues to - overcome."You can rise again, it's not as though one thing happens to you - whether it's an accident, depression or anything - and that's the end of your story," she says. "You can become who you want to be."
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